If you’re a driver, you’ll know the potential danger of blind spots. If we’re not aware of them they can cause near misses, or more fatally, carnage – for you and anyone else nearby.
And that’s the thing about blind spots. We’re not always aware of them until it’s too late.
I went for years with a blind spot. It was a belief I had about who I was. I remember a friend of mine saying ‘you’re the strongest person I know’ and I took that as a compliment – and it was meant as a compliment.
But my big blind spot was that I was unable to show or articulate hurt.
I wanted to ‘stop’ feeling the ‘bad’ stuff.
I wanted it just to go away. (It doesn’t, of course, however hard we try. It just resurfaces in mainly unhelpful or self-sabotaging ‘coping’ mechanisms).
‘Be strong’ was my mantra. I’d clench my stomach muscles so tight to try not to feel ‘that feeling’.
Good for my core (Pilates is better) – not good for anything else!
The person who changed my life was the first coach I ever met (he trained me, actually).
It got messy as we peeled away the layers.
I hated it. I felt ashamed, exposed. (Big girls don’t cry, right?!)
But I knew that this was the most loving thing I could do for myself.
And he said something that stuck with me – ‘you can’t take people further (as a coach) than you’ve been yourself’.
I’m forever grateful to him for changing my life.
I can only describe it as helping me see the world in many hues and nuances and colours and flavours and feelings. An opening up rather than a shutting down.
The road is not always easy to navigate. It’s tempting to run back to where you came from – to ‘safety’.
But I’m glad I decided to take that new road rather than crash and burn.
And yes, sometimes it takes a big, deep breath and one foot forward.
P.S. I’ve been talking some more about Blind spots in my Facebook Group this week. We’re also talking energy vampires, job hunting and much more. Join the community for support, ideas, resources and more.