In my experience there are two main reasons why people donāt reach their full potential in life (whatever that means for them).
Itās rarely down to a lack of intelligence, experience or knowledge.
It is partly down to a lack of self-confidence and self-belief. (That wonāt surprise you).
But itās also a lack of ability to take specific action to start to build that confidence. (Because one of those limiting beliefs we often hold is āIāll wait until Iām more confident and then Iāll do x, y or zā).
We see our lack of confidence as such a big āthingā but actually it isnāt. (Only in our heads).
You can work on those beliefs and you can take small actions at the same time. The key word here is small.
You donāt have to leap out of your comfort zone all the time. You can tiptoe.
And consistency pays off.
Your confidence ā with a good dose of humility - empowers others. The ripple effect that it can create is enormous.
So, if youāre managing a team right now and you want you and them t...
One of the things that can deflate our self-confidence is rejection ā in fact rejection is one of the things we are hard wired to fear the most.
So I was interested to read recently about Jia Jiangās experiments and work on embracing rejection.
It got me thinking ā one of the things my father always did was ask for a discount ā pretty much anywhere we went. My teenage self would cringe and want the ground to swallow me up. But he got surprisingly more āyes, okāsā than you might think.
And I realise how much this helped me later in life ā negotiating ridiculously low hotel room rates when I worked in the travel industry, in particular, to get the best deals for our clients.
Even now, if weāre making a big purchase (house, car) Iām the one who asks for the reduction/discount with no qualms whatsoever. Itās an area of my life where I feel very confident.
So it got me thinking about other areas in my life where I would like to be more confident and how I might āpractise rejectionā.
Hereās ...
P.S. If you missed last weekās article, you can find itĀ here.
Iāve learned over the years that the first step to making something happen is to simply declare your intention ā to make a public commitment.
Yes it can be uncomfortable.
But public accountability is powerful.
So if thereās something you want, start by āputting it out thereā.
And, importantly, āput it out thereā to people who are on your side. Whoāve got your back. Who will support you in whatever way you need (and call you out on any BS.)
My big commitment for January 2020 is to launch my online and group coaching programme.
Iāve been planning it for a while but ā¦.. (Yep, my avoidance is linked not only to the volume of work involved but to a bit of āinner criticā a bit of āwhat ifā¦.ā(insert ridiculous catastrophic phrase hereā¦.)
All the usual stuff that I am sure you will recognise in your own life. (Fear of rejection is one of the most powerful fears of all).
But we have a choice. To hide and stay āsafeā or to come out where it feels a bit less safe.
Iām going with the latt...
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