How to get to ‘the truth’

coping resilience truth May 08, 2020

I’ve been noticing how much there is in my inbox about resilience, at the moment. (You’ll find my team resilience articles on LinkedIn if you’ve not seen them already).

I’m also noticing something else. How much we love to ‘be strong’ or be recognised for our ‘coping skills’ (I’m guilty as charged).

We’ve often been taught to put on a brave face or a ‘stiff upper lip’ (so British!).

‘I’m resilient’ we tell ourselves (as if resilience is a fixed state rather than something that fluctuates).

So, when someone says, ‘are you okay?’ we say ‘fine’!

But I don’t think that’s a great question right now (or ever) if we want to know the truth.

When I ask, ‘what’s going on for you’? and then shut up, I can have a deeper conversation.

So, let me ask you…. ‘what’s going on for you right now?’ because I generally care about you...

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Your faulty thinking is killing your resilience

As always I’m taking a break from writing new blogs in August to recharge my batteries (I try to practise what I preach) so over this month I will be sharing four of this year’s most popular blog posts with you. If you haven’t read them yet….here’s your chance!

This week it’s about resilience.

In the series I wrote on the Six Characteristics of a Resilient Team, we looked at the topics of common purpose, team norms, trust and candid conversations. 

The fourth characteristic of a resilient team is the ability to think resiliently.

I wrote about thinking traps fairly recently so I’m not going to repeat myself on that front.

But I will say this. The more teams can become aware of their own ‘faulty thinking’, particularly the faulty thinking that is eroding their resilience, the better.

One of the teams I have been working with recently had a collective ‘thinking trap’ of ‘externalising’. Blaming...
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